(Disclaimer: Sorry Mommy, I know you are reading "my blog thingy" these days, and I love you for that, but there is some swearing in this one!! Love you. N~)
On Tuesday night right before I went to bed, I posted the audio version of "Go the Fuck to Sleep" on my Facebook page. It is read by the ever so awesome Mr. Samuel L. Jackson. Now some might think, really? You mean big angry black man, Samuel L. Jackson? "Le Royal with Cheese", Samuel L. Jackson? "Snakes on a Mother Fuckin' Plane" Samuel L. Jackson? And yes, yes, and yes, that very same one. And really he was perfect for this part. Go on over HERE and have a listen and you'll see what I mean.
Last night after I got home from an awesome networking event (@JenBanksYEG teaching a room of entrepreneurs all about the coolness of SEO!!), I hopped back on Twitter and Facebook for one last check before I went to bed and I saw that the lovely Laura from Greek Momma, had commented on my GTFTS link and so I headed over to read her latest blog post.
I loved her post and agreed with about 90% of it. But that last 10% kept me up last night and I had a very restless sleep, combined with a kid that kept waking up. Coincidence? I think not!!
If you will recall, I blogged about the sleep situation in our house a few months ago. C is still doing really well and is sleeping through the night, but L is just not there yet. And I accept THAT! My husband and I have made a conscious decision about nighttime parenting and "sleep training" and we, under no circumstances, will consider any form of 'Crying it Out' as an option for our family. And because I also believe that falling asleep in the arms of one you love and who loves you the most is an amazing thing, it is how I have always put my kids to sleep.
BUT, here is where the 10% comes into play. Do I like that I am usually up at least 4-5 times a night to put my child back to bed? NO. Do I think she really needs another sip of water, or trip to the bathroom, or 'just one minute' of nursing? NO. Do I think it is fair that she ONLY wants Mama at night and gets physically upset if Natural Urban Dad even stirs and tries to put her back to bed? NO.
Do I get frustrated some nights about the whole situation? YES!! Are there times when in my weak moments, I just want to tell her to "Go the Fuck to Sleep"? YES!! Do I think this is good parenting? Um, obviously NO.
So here is what I think about this book and why I really do like it. I think that the author, Adam Mansbach, has taken what all parents may be thinking in the big, bad, deep, dark recesses of our minds at one time or another and has put in down on paper and published it for all to read. This may not sit well with some people who do not like to go to that deep, dark place and prefer to keep things all happy and rosy and that is just fine. I personally would prefer to be in touch with these feelings, and know that they are, wait for it......
YUP, that is right folks, feeling frustrated about a situation, and even mad sometimes is a completely normal feeling to have as a parent. If you think that you are not allowed to feel anything negative towards your kids EVER, I am really sorry to have to tell you this, but you are not living in reality!! Parenting is THE TOUGHEST JOB on earth, and we are all going to have our bad days or moments doing it. And like Laura said in her post, there are ways to deal with these times, take a break, get help, go for a walk, give yourself a time-out. Please DO NOT take out your frustrations on your kids, because that is definitely not the answer.
Maybe you steal away in your room for 15 minutes, take out your copy of "Go the Fuck to Sleep", read it (out loud, if that helps) and have a good laugh at the absurdity of it all. Then, take a deep breath and head back out into the fray!!
I for one am hoping that Adam also writes the follow-up books, "Eat your Fucking Food!" and "Put on your Fucking Shoes Already!!
When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out.