Bloated and Lopsided

If you have been reading my blog for a few months then you know a couple of things about me already, or more specifically my medical history! I have had Rheumatoid Arthritis for 20 years, I have had both of my hips replaced, I recently dislocated one of said hips and this week I had some minor knee surgery.

As a result of my, as I like to call it, 'Oh, So Crappy' start to 2011 I have not been able to DO anything active or physical or remotely resembling exercise in almost 2 months. I miss my Bikram yoga terribly, but have not been going for obvious reasons. And because I am often an emotional and self-pitying eater, my diet and eating habits have not exactly been up to snuff either.

So, yeah, I am feeling a bit bloated and soft and weak and REALLY out of shape! And to compound matters, my hip injury and the recent knee surgery were both on my right side. So I am also lopsided. If you look closely at my butt, I am pretty sure the right side is hanging a LOT lower than the left and has a full cup more of cottage cheese in it!
I really wish I was one of those people who lives to work out. Don't get me wrong. I like the way I feel after a good workout. I KNOW it is good for me, and I KNOW what I need to do to get those good feelings. Before kids I had a very healthy gym routine and slightly un-natural affinity for a good Spin Class. I also had a personal trainer.

Oh David, how I miss you.....

And no, not because he was super hot (I mean he wasn't hard on the eyes by any stretch) or because of his adorable Aussie accent. Mostly I miss him because he really GOT me. He understood my goals, my limitations and above all, he understood how to motivate me.  He really was (and likely still is) one of the best personal trainers I have ever met. The problem now is that he works on the exact opposite side of the city to me and my life is definitely not what it used to be.

I actually have a home gym in my house. We built a room specifically for that purpose, mirrors on the wall, TV hanging from the ceiling and everything. It houses a spin bike, a bosu ball, a regular exercise ball and multiple free weights and resistance bands. You would think that I would have no excuse or problems working out since it is all just literally 20 steps away from where I now sit.

Sadly, that is not the case.

I need outside motivation. It is how I work, especially when it comes to this part of my life. I need someone to be accountable to (aside from myself) and I need help with this. In other words, I need someone to kick my ass into high gear and get me to just DO IT already! Because on my own I can find an unending list of reasons that I can't just right now, and I'll start tomorrow, or next week, or next month on the 2nd at 8:00 PM every night (yeah right).

When you come right down to it, I am simply a lazy person. I like TV, a lot, and my lopsided butt is spending way too much time on the couch these days. But here is the REAL problem. All of this is really starting to get to me and I don't feel good about myself. I don't feel sexy or desirable and it has been a long time since I have turned myself on when I look in the mirror, let alone anyone else (if that sounds weird to anyone, then you are just not as vain as I am)!

So, I have made a decision.

I am going to get me a new personal trainer. I am looking at it as an investment in ME and a damn good one too. And I am expecting BIG ROI too, so whoever it is has his or her work cut out for them. Money is also a big motivator for me. If I have to pay for something, then I had better get my money's worth!! I place more value on services that I have to pay for and I also expect more when I am shelling out my husband's hard earned cash for something. (Oh, he's gonna love that!)

I need someone to be able to either come to me or work within my schedule. I need to find myself a new 'Dave', a trainer that gets me, understands my medical history and limitations and can help me get back on track and to that point where whenever I pass a mirror I have to stop and take a second look at myself because I am so damn HOT!

I have about 6 weeks of healing to go, but in the meantime the search is on for "Natasha's New Trainer". If that is you or if you know of anyone who might fit the bill, send them my way. I think I will interview a few different candidates before I make my final decision.  But the decision has been made, I am going to turn this crappy year around and make 2011 the year of HOTNESS!

And on that note, I must go elevate my leg, put more ice on the damn knee and pray to God that I can still fit into BOTH sides of my jeans once the swelling goes down and I get my lopsided butt moving again.

Be Healthy Y'all!

My younger, fitter years! And just look at those BOOBS!!