GawdDAMMIT! I was hoping I didn't have to write about this AGAIN.
But here we go....
Have I ever told you about the time my all male management team at the large pharmaceutical company I worked for invited me to the hospitality suite at a Business Conference and when I entered the room I was the only female employee there along with a full size blow up sex doll?
Or the time my senior manager (same company) followed me to a porta-potty at a different out of town meeting and tried to enter it and I was pulled aside the next day and warned not to say anything to anyone about it?
Or about the time when I was 11 and I was riding my bike with my girlfriend, like kids do around their neighbourhoods, and a guy pulled up in his muscle car to (what we thought) ask for directions, but NO, it was so he could show us his DICK that he had pulled out of his pants?
Or about the neighbours whom EVERYONE loved because they were the only house on our street that had Super Channel and how the husband would invite kids for sleepovers and to watch movies while his wife worked nights as a nurse. And during those sleepovers he would sexually molest the kids? Yours truly being one of them.
Or about my Grade 6 teacher who took me into the supply room to console me after I was punched in the gut (by a boy) and who thought trying to kiss and fondle me was the way to do that?
Or the real reason, at 14, I had to quit my first job as a busser at the Steakhouse in St. Albert wasn't because of the smoking like I told my mom, but because of the constant harassment I was getting from the all male kitchen staff?
Oh forget it.
Honestly, I have lost track of the times in my life I have been sexually harassed or inappropriately touched or propositioned by MEN.
Yes, of course #METOO.
Ask ANY woman and she will tell you #metoo. And even if she doesn't or can't say it (for reasons that are NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS), I guarantee you, it has happened to her.
I am reading Alias Grace right now. (Yes, I know it is on TV, but I also don't have Cable anymore and I LIKE BOOKS). Grace is retelling her story to Dr. Jordan and he asks her:
Only what was usual.
Think about that. When I read those lines last night, I had to stop and take a breath. Because if that isn't the truth of this world.... OOF!
This is the culture we have bred into humanity. That woman are to expect a "usual" display from men of sexual, predatory, inappropriate, demeaning behaviour. Especially women they view in their realm of power or having no "social" status, with no recourse to say or do anything to stop them.
I have seen people criticizing the #MeToo hashtag (or campaign if that is what you want to call it) as just another form of slacktivism. Pop it up on your Twitter or Facebook feed and you're good. You did your part. You said the thing. Now move on. (Don't even get me started on how triggering it is for people to have to constantly tell or re-tell the traumatic events that have happened to them!)
Fine, opinions will be had and those people can have theirs.
HERE IS MINE. (That's what you came here for right?)
I see #METOO as a fucking RALLYING CRY.
A GODDAMN WARCRY ACTUALLY!
#METOO is a uniting force. A force that should scare the shit out of ALL THE MEN out there who have thought or still think that they are entitled to that "usual" display of predatory behaviour towards women.
To the men (and women) who insist that all of this is simply "locker room talk", or the people who continue to use the phrase "boys will be boys", or who truly believe that men can't be in the same room with women because of their uncontrollable urges, I say WATCH YOUR FUCKING BACKS!
WE ARE COMING FOR YOU!
We will name NAMES.
We will CALL YOU OUT.
We are NOT going to be AFRAID.
YOU will be shamed. NOT US.
We will not be ashamed of the things that were DONE TO US.
We are not as some have said, claiming some sort of "victim mentality" and wanting validation as such. (Also - FUCK YOU! Victim blamer/shamers.)
#METOO means that we are done believing the men who are doing these things are more important than we are.
#METOO means that we refuse to live in a world where 5, 10, 20 years from now our own daughters are saying the same fucking thing!
#METOO means THIS SHIT STOPS RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
And just so you know, I have been watching "The 100" on Netflix (totally BINGE-WORTHY show BTW) and as I write this, I am imagining myself as Clarke or Lexa saying this to an ARMY OF #METOO-ers as we are about to attack our enemies with the full force of our might!
And as the Grounders Say...
#METOO is not about being a victim, it is about showing the world that we are an army of survivors, OF FIGHTERS, of truth sayers, and WE WILL NOT BE STOPPED.
MY FELLOW WARRIORS,
I SEE YOU!
I BELEIVE YOU!
I WILL FIGHT FOR AND WITH YOU!
For more important reading to stoke the fires for this rage battle, please read: